Well, today was a wonderful day. For almost a solid week now, I have felt like I was almost drowning in anxiety. The IVF information overload was consuming my thoughts day and night (to the point where it was all I dreamed about...when I could actually sleep). There are so many details and SO much information.....so many questions. And, being the planner that I am, much of my stress was just coming from the whole "not knowing" what our protocol was going to be for our IVF cycle. I have constantly been worrying about what different medications I would take, the dosages of each medicine, how much would they all cost, would this work, and so on. Today was the day I had been waiting for....the day we were meeting with our nurse to actually go over our protocol, and the day we would get most of our questions answered. Everything we heard today was great. The only thing that could have made today better would have been if the nurse told us we were already pregnant and didn't have to do any of this....but where would the fun in that be?! :)
Not only did we get our questions answered, and I got the reassurance that I needed that I am a very good candidate for this process with very good odds of success (even though nothing is certain or can be guaranteed), and found out that our medications were going to be WAY less than we had anticipated.
On top of all the good news we received at the doctor's office, we also received another blessing from a sweet friend. This is what made my heart absolutely swell. One of the wonderful women that I work with underwent IVF herself on multiple occasions and started trying for a baby before we even got pregnant with Tenley. After several IVF attempts, and almost giving up, they finally were successful and are expecting not one, but two sweet babies in a couple months. YAY!
When I first found out we were going to have to undergo IVF, she was the one I went to. While I initially only got a few minutes with her in passing to chit-chat about the whole IVF process, she eased my anxiety....This sweet friend called me tonight to check on me and see how things were going, and on top of all of that, told me that she had a $900 bottle of medication (unopened) that she wanted to just give us. Since it was one of the medications we needed, I offered to pay her and she absolutely refused. She said that others had helped them some along the way, and they had hoped that they would be able to use that bottle of medication to help someone else. What an amazing blessing......
I also believe that God is using this to teach me something else as well. I have always been someone that would much rather bless somebody else than have someone bless me. It actually makes me physically uncomfortable when someone does something selfless for me... I'm not used to it....Giving is WAY easier than receiving. Something that I'm trying to learn though, (and it is NOT easy) is that you can bless somebody else by allowing them to bless you....Of all the lessons God has tried to teach me over the years, and it feels like there has been A LOT, this is definitely a tough one. I'm thankful for this learning experience, and for my sweet friend & her husband. I hope that one day, in whatever form it may be, that I may serve as a blessing to someone else that's hurting and going through this as well...
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